The second time was at an agriturismo, a bed and breakfast type facility where food is typical of the area and more than likely produced at the property.
When I arrived just before the dinner hour, the women setting the large outside farm-style table completely ignored me. I could have been invisible. I followed them unhindered through a door that I discovered led to a small kitchen and bar. Ok, wrong entrance. I then caught the attention of one woman and asked if a room was available and she indicated that I needed to talk to... the other lady. The one a few paces ahead of me. I couldn't believe it. What happened to service?
Once I was registered...part of the clan so to speak, they warmed up like I flipped a switch. But if I had had a choice, I just might have gone in search of other lodging.
PS. This dinner brought back memories of another dinner about 3 years ago when I was near Bagni di Lucca. I found myself seated next to a long table where only men filled the room. They all turned to greet me as I left at the end of my evening. Here, I found myself seated, the only woman among nine men, Italian and German. Italian men are wonderful and can boost a woman's ego in milliseconds and this group made me feel incredible. I laughed and laughed and laughed. That was an awesome dinner. Food was good too.